The wheels on this

[morbidgorilla]

Please put all random shxt here. Cheers!!

[ValuePack]

Too bad Exeter didn't have Internationals rolling on gold BBS' in the late '80s.:(

*licks window*

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/woopass.gif
Jeff walks into a bar and sees his friend Paul slumped over the bar. He walks over and asks Paul what's wrong.

"Well," replies Paul, "You know that beautiful girl at work that I wanted to ask out, but I got an erection every time I saw her?"
"Yes," replies Jeff with a laugh.
"Well," says Paul, straightening up, "I finally worked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed."
"That's great!" says Jeff, "When are you going out?"
"I went to meet her this evening," continues Paul, "but I was worried I'd get an erection again. So I got some duct tape and taped 'it' to my leg, so if I did, it wouldn't show."
"Sensible" says Jeff.
"So I get to her door," says Paul, "and I rang her doorbell. She answered it in the sheerest, sexiest, dress you ever saw."
"And what happened then?" "I kicked her in the face."

[morbidgorilla]

Too off color?

[Ichigo]

i like it haha.

[ValuePack]

Lol!!

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/nooo.jpg


A man wakes up in a hospital bed after a terrible accident and cries, "DOC, DOC... I can't feel my legs, I can't feel my legs!!" "Well of course you can't", replies the Doc, "We've amputated both of your arms."

[morbidgorilla]

I had a problem with my internets
http://www.kontraband.com/show/show.asp?ID=4675&CAT=anims&NSFW=0&rtn=search-4675&Keywords=bush

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/mom.jpg
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle.

A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's s ooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own, so does she."

[Nate8409]

Hahahahah. That is awesome Will.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/megaflicks.jpg
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebodyto paint my porch," he said. "How much would you charge me?"
The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need were in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her. "And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, "it's a Lexus."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/meth_lab.jpg
A young man on acid walked into a dentist's office and said, "Can you help me? I think I'm a moth."
The dentist said, "You don't need a dentist. You need a psychiatrist."
"Yes, I know," the man said. The dentist asked, "So then why did you come in here?" The man replied, "The light was on."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/true_love.jpg
A beautiful woman went to the gynecologist. The doctor took one look at the woman and all his professionalism flew out the window. He immediately told her to get undressed.

After she disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. While doing so he asked her, "Do you know what I am doing?"
"Yes," she replied, "You are checking for abrasions or dermatological abnormalities."
"That's right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I am doing now?" he asked.
"Yes," she said, "You are checking for lumps which might indicate breast cancer."
"Correct," replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I am doing now?" "Yes," she said, "You're getting herpes: which is why I came here in the first place."

[ValuePack]

LOL! x325474312 The beer bottle girl has talent.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/race_card.jpg
"As part of his ongoing financial disclosures, Jesse Jackson told the Chicago Sun Times this week that he doesn't have a checking account or a credit card. Probably because to get those, you need a job." —Tina Fey, on Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update"

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/pull_finger.jpg
Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room, and Donald wanted to have sex with Daisy. The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have a condom?"

Donald frowned and said, "No."
Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a condom, they could not have sex. "Maybe they sell them at the front desk," she suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms. "Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled one out from under the counter and gave it to Donald. The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put that on your bill?
"No!" Donald quacked, "What kind of a pervert do you think I am?"
---
On the first day of college, the dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules:
"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you $180. Are there any questions?" One student raised his hand and asked, "How much for a season pass?"

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/george.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/miller.jpg
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded , "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney almost died. The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair."
---
Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all talking one day.
Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world."
Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the most disgusting person in the world."
So they all decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified.
Sleeping Beauty went in first and came out looking deliriously happy. "It's official, I AM the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant, "I am now officially the smallest person in the world."
Sometime later, Quasimodo comes out looking utterly confused & frustrated and says, "Who the hell is Rosie O'Donnell?"

[ValuePack]

"Who the hell is Rosie O'Donnell?"

You win this round, O'Donnell, but there can only be one highlander-moto!

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/artist.jpg
Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play high fidelity music in women's breast implants.

The iTit will cost $499 or $599 depending on speaker size. This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women have always complained about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/chances.jpg
A teacher is instructing her fourth grade class, and she's telling them that the word of the day is 'contagious.' She asks if anyone can use this word in a sentence, and several students raise their hands. "Carl," she says.

Carl says, "My dad told me to stay away from kids with mumps 'cause they're contagious."
"Very good," says the teacher.
Then she picks Suzie, who says, "The atmosphere was contagious."
The teacher says, "Excellent, Suzie!"
Then she notices that little Johnny has his hand up at the back of the class. "Yes, Johnny?" Johnny says, "The other day, me and my dad's a-sittin' around, and we saw our blonde neighbor painting her fence. She had a tiny little model car paintbrush, and she was going in tiny little strokes up and down the fence, and my dad says to me, 'Jesus, it's gonna take that **** ages to finish that fence.'"

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/findx.jpg
How To Drive In Jersey

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is New-erk not New-ark. (actually, it's pronounced "NERK")
2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
3. The minimum acceptable speed on the turnpike is 85 mph. On the parkway it's 105 or 110. Anything less is considered "Wussy."
4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Jersey has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, in Monmouth county, SUV-driving, cellphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.
6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot.
7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in all of Jersey . Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting.
8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks,dogs, cats, barrels, cones, celebs, rubber-neckers, shredded tires, cell-phoners, deer and other road kill, and the Homeless feeding on any of these items.
9. Mapquest does not work here -- none of the roads are where they say they are or go where they say they do and all the Turnpike ez pass lanes are moved each night once again to make your ride more exciting.
10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally activated."
11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly.. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. 12. Do not try to estimate travel time -- just leave Monday afternoon for Tuesday appointments, by noon Thursday for Friday and right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.

[ValuePack]

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l95/czelle26/PlayBillSheep.gif

[ValuePack]

How do you know when you have satisfied a red head?



She unties you.

[ValuePack]

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l95/czelle26/A20MrT-Animal-Kermit.jpg

[unsakred]

oh my...

[morbidgorilla]

Thats Boss!!!!!!!!!!

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/umm.jpg
I met this older woman at a bar last night. She wasn't bad for 57, we drank and bull****ted a bit, then she asked if I'd ever had the 'sportsman's double', a mother and daughter threesome?

I said no. We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was my lucky night. I went back to her place. She put the hall light on and shouted upstairs, "Mom you still awake?"

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/sexy.jpg
A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me in this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and free education!"

The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican."
The man goes on and encounters another passerby "Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America !"
The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."
The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America!"
That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East , I am not American!"
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?"
She says, "No, I am from Russia!"
Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"
The Russian lady checks her watch and says, "Probably at work."
---
The Personnel Manager said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job."
Mujibar said, "I ready"
The manager said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green."
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister manager, I ready"
The manager said, "Go ahead." Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'"
http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/z24-1-small.jpg (http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/z24-1.jpg)

[ValuePack]

Z34 R teH fAst4R!

I was wondering when that Bloodhound Gang album cover would pop up. That's what I'll look like in 2 decades or so... oh yeah, hold back the laaaadieeees!

[morbidgorilla]

GO GO QUAD 4

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/butt.jpg
Before the marriage:

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: NO! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: NO! Why you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Yes!
She: Will you hit me?
He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes. Now after the marriage... read it from the bottom up!

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/brother.jpg
A man goes to his doctor and says, ''Doctor, Doctor, please help me! I've got a problem.'' The doctor examines the man and finds the man has a red ring around his penis. The doctor gives him an ointment to rub on the problem area.

''It's all cleared up!'' the man reports when he returns. ''But what was that medication you gave me?'' ''Lipstick remover.''

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/duke.jpg
BBQ RULES

We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part:
(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine...
(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
Important again:
(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine....
(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all: (10) Everyone PRAISES and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/bottom.jpg
A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks. While they're sitting there having a good time together, she starts talking about this really great new drink. The more she talks about it, the more excited she gets, and starts trying to talk her boyfriend into having one. After a while he gives in and lets her order the drink for him. The bartender brings the drink and puts the following on the bar -- A saltshaker, a shot of Baileys, and a shot of lime juice.

The boyfriend looks at the items quizzically and the woman explains.
"First you put a bit of the salt on your tongue, next you drink the shot of Baileys and hold it in your mouth, and finally you drink the lime juice."
So, the boyfriend, trying to go along and please her, goes for it.
He puts the salt on his tongue -- salty but OK
He drinks the shot of Baileys - smooth, rich, cool, very pleasant.
He Thinks - this is OK. Finally he picks up the lime juice and drinks it.
.... In one second the sharp lime taste hits...
.... At two seconds the Baileys curdles
.... At three seconds the salty curdled bitter taste hits.
This triggers his gag reflex but being manly, and not wanting to disappoint his girlfriend, he swallows the now nasty drink. When he finally chokes it down he turns to his girlfriend, and says, "Jesus, what do you call that drink?" She smiles widely at him and says, "Blow Job Revenge."

[morbidgorilla]

An American, a Scot and a Canuk were in a terrible car accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room, but all three of them died before they arrived. Just as they were about to put the toe tag on the American, he stirred and opened his eyes. Astonished, the doctors and nurses present asked him what happened.
"Well," said the American, "I remember the crash, and then there was a beautiful light, and then the Canadian and the Scot and I were standing at the gates of heaven. St. Peter approached us and said that we were all too young to die, and that for a donation of $100, we could return to the earth."

[morbidgorilla]

A guy says to the bartender, "A glass of your finest Less, please."

"Less? Never heard of it."
"C'mon, sure you have."
"No, really, we don't stock it. What is it? Some kind of foreign beer?" "I'm not sure. It was my doctor who mentioned it. He said I should drink Less."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/797337.1.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"

"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma..." And they say blondes are dumb.
http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/pictures_freedom_unicorn.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/boob.jpg
A drunk in a bar barfs all over his own shirt. “Damn,” he says. “I puked on my shirt again. If the wife finds out, she’s gonna kill me.”

“Not to worry,” says the bartender as he sticks a $20 bill in the drunk’s pocket. “Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill.”
So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocket and finds two twenties. “Why are there two twenties?” she asks. The drunk replies, “Oh, yeah, he crapped in my pants, too.”

[ValuePack]

http://www.blogsmithmedia.com/www.tmz.com/media/2007/06/0608_paris_car_cry_inf.jpg

Go, Paris, go!

[morbidgorilla]

that warms my heart

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/sick.jpg
A cop was patrolling at night in a well-known spot. He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light glowing brightly. The cop carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine.

He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, knitting. Puzzled by this surprising situation, the cop walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window.
The young man lowers his window. "Uh, yes, officer?"
"What are you doing?"
"Well, isn't it obvious? I'm reading a magazine, sir."
Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the cop says, "And her, what is she doing?"
The young man shrugs: "Sir, I believe she's knitting a pullover sweater."
Now, the cop is totally confused. A young couple. Alone, in a car, at night in a lovers' lane. And nothing obscene is happening!
"What's your age, young man?"
"I'm 25, sir."
"And her ... what's her age?" The young man looks at his watch and replies, "She'll be 18 in 11 minutes."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/mother.jpg
A young blonde woman goes to an office for a job interview . The interviewer decides to start with the basics. "So, miss, can you tell us your age, please?" The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 3 seconds before replying "Ehh... 23!"

The interviewer tries another straight forward one to break the ice. "Can you tell us your height, please?" She stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. Then she traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces, "Five foot three!".
This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics. "And ehh, just to confirm for our records, your name please?" The blonde bobs her head from side to side for about twenty seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying "Stephanie".
The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks "Just out of curiosity, miss. We can understand your counting on your fingers to work out your age, and the measuring tape for your height is obvious, but what were you doing when we asked you your name?" "Oh, that!" replies the blonde, That's just me running through 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...'

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/geek_tie.jpg
On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung!"
I took a drink from my can of Busch Light, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Ray Ban sunglasses and stared directly into the eyes of this nosy ilovemenilovemenilovemen neighbor and then calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/tested.jpg
How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

Golden Retriever:
The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?
Border Collie:
Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Dachshund:
You know that I can't reach that damn lamp!
Rottweiler:
Make me.
Lab:
Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?
Malamute:
Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Jack Russell Terrier:
I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
Poodle:
I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Cocker Spaniel:
Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Doberman Pinscher:
While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.
Boxer:
Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark...
Mastiff:
Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.
Chihuahua:
Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
Irish Wolfhound:
Can somebody else do it? I've got this massive hangover...
Pointer:
I see it, there it is, there it is, right there....
Greyhound:
It isn't moving. Who cares?
Australian Shepherd:
First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle....
Old English Sheep Dog:
Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?
German Shepard:
Alright, everyone stop where you are! Who busted the light? I SAID, "STOP WHERE YOU ARE!!!"
Hound Dog:
ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz Cat:
Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So the question is: How long will it be before I can expect light

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/thoughts.jpg
A 2007 study by Clemson University found that the average American walks about 900 miles per year.

Another study by the American Beer Institute found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year. That means, on average, Americans get approximately 41 miles per gallon. Not bad.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/whatball.jpg
Ever wonder why golf is growing in popularity and why people who don't even play go to tournaments or watch it on TV? These truisms may shed light:

Golf is an honorable game, with the overwhelming majority of players being honorable people who don't need referees.
Golfers don't have some of their players in jail every week.
Golfers don't beat up on each other during the game.
In golf you cannot fail 70% of the time and make $9 million a season, like the best baseball hitters (.300 batting average) do.
Professional golfers are compensated in direct proportion to how well they play.
Golfers don't hold out for more money, or demand new contracts, because of another player's deal.
Professional golfers don't demand that the taxpayers pay for the courses on which they play.
You can watch the best golfers in the world up close, at any tournament, including the majors, all day, every day for $25 or $30. The cost for a seat in the nosebleed section at the Super Bowl will cost around $300 or more.
When golfers make a mistake, nobody is there to cover for them or back them up.
The PGA Tour raises more money for charity in one year than the National Football League does in two.
Golf doesn't change its rules to attract fans.
Golfers have to adapt to an entirely new playing area each week.
Golf doesn't have free agency.
You can hear birds chirping on the golf course during a tournament.
Tiger Woods can hit a golf ball three times as far as Barry Bonds can hit a baseball.
Finally, here's a slice of golf history you might enjoy: Why do full-length golf courses have 18 holes, and not 20, or 10 or an even dozen? During a discussion among the club's membership board at St. Andrews in 1858, one of the members pointed out that it takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch. By limiting himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/heyy.jpg
First-year students at Texas A&M's Vet School were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, "In Vet Medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body.

For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck it in his mouth. "Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the anal opening of the dead cow and sucking on it. When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention."

[morbidgorilla]

Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Director of Nursing became aware of Edna's heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in his bathroom with the belt of his robe right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead!"
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself; I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"
---
A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well they decide to go to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his trousers and washes his hands again.
The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist."
The guy, surprised, says "Yes... how did you figure that out?"
"Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands."
One thing led to another and they make love.
After they have done, the girl says, "You must be a good dentist."
The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Sure, I'm a good dentist, how did you figure that out?" "Didn't feel a thing!"

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/no_no.jpg
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"

Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?" The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/bear.jpg
This bear and this rabbit were talking.

The bear asked the rabbit, "Do you have trouble with poop sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit said, "No." So the bear picked up the rabbit and used it to wipe his butt.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/potty.jpg
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize, "Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me."
He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside.
She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, "How does that feel?"
He replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell!"
---
Thought for the day:
Handle every situation like a dog... If you can't Eat it or Screw it, Piss on it and Walk Away.

[morbidgorilla]

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/4738/6.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/4738/5.jpg

[wagonmafia]

hey morbid, you say claremont sucks. I was stuck there a few months ago building that storage units across the road from toyota and up the street from subaru.

[morbidgorilla]

not sucks as much as it blows. its not too bad just drug infested far past the normal rate for a town this size should be. on top of that they charge way too much!!
You should have let me know, I would have shown you the good back roads.

[morbidgorilla]

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/3117/9.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/517/1.jpg

[wagonmafia]

i saw a white bugeye there a few times with subaru decals all over it, and a nice red gc impreza(i saw that drive by a few times.) As for the drug thing i couldnt agree with you more. Always thought painkillers was for pain!!!???

[morbidgorilla]

she lives local and belongs to vtboost
the red one is a 2.2 rs right?
yea and theres a guy with an 07 sti round somewheres

[banned4life]

will -

u are single handlingy keeping this thread alive

[wagonmafia]

while i was seeing this girl in claremont, i saw a a blue bugeye with some serious winter tires. looked like this guy had fun out there. might have to take my wagon that way to check out those back roads.

[morbidgorilla]

Just doin my thing EB

Ha you betcha this summer i hope to host a few BBQs at my spot. I have a nice big backyard

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/stick10.jpg
One day little Johnny heard a noise and peeked into his Parents room to check it out. He opened the door to see his mom bent over the dresser and dad going at it, behind her. Johnny's dad saw him and gave him a little wink as Johnny closed the door. After business was finished, Dad went to check on little Johnny. He opened his bedroom door to find Grandma bent over the dresser and little Johnny going at it behind her.

Dad yelled, "Johnny, what the hell are you doing?!" Little Johnny replied, "It's not so funny when it's YOUR mom, is it?"

[wagonmafia]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/stick10.jpg
One day little Johnny heard a noise and peeked into his Parents room to check it out. He opened the door to see his mom bent over the dresser and dad going at it, behind her. Johnny's dad saw him and gave him a little wink as Johnny closed the door. After business was finished, Dad went to check on little Johnny. He opened his bedroom door to find Grandma bent over the dresser and little Johnny going at it behind her.

Dad yelled, "Johnny, what the hell are you doing?!" Little Johnny replied, "It's not so funny when it's YOUR mom, is it?"


thats just wrong~rotfl~

[nhaspentr]

http://www.blogsmithmedia.com/www.tmz.com/media/2007/06/0608_paris_car_cry_inf.jpg

Go, Paris, go!

cop in the passenger seat looks pretty hot!

[Nate8409]

Hahahaha. The hot cop looks like she is smiling!!

[morbidgorilla]

I would be...the smiling cop is thinking about the manditory de-louseing and fire hose shower paris is gonna be recieveing

[morbidgorilla]

A cowboy has spent many days crossing the Texas plains without water. His horse has already died of thirst. He's crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase. He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie.

She is wearing a FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency) ID badge and a dull gray dress. There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear. "Well, cowboy," says the genie. "You know how I work.... You have three wishes." "I'm not falling for this.", said the cowboy... "I'm not going to trust a FEMA genie."
"What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!"
The cowboy thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right. "OK! I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink."
***POOF*** the cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen, and he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
"OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish."
"My second wish is that I was rich beyond my wildest dreams."
***POOF*** the cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.
"OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!"
After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says... "I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me."
***POOF*** He was turned into a tampon.
The moral of the story: If the government offers you anything, there's going to be a string attached.
---Q: What is a man's Ultimate embarrassment?
A: Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/wait.jpg
Q: What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
A: Spot.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/invite.jpg
Idiot Sightings

IDIOT SIGHTING: Hubby and I had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not. Four is larger than two." We haven't used Sears repair since.
IDIOT SIGHTING: I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many Deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore." From Kingman , KS
IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. He was a Chef? Yep... From Kansas City.
IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask." Happened in Birmingham, Alabama.
IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS.
IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker: She was leaving the company due to "downsizing" Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a group at Texas Instruments.
IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself, and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office no less. IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "Its open!" His reply, "I know - I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi.

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/shortage.jpg
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what's your problem?'

Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!'
Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'
Harry: '9.'
Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?'
Harry: '36.'
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, 'I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade.'
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, 'Let me ask him some questions.'
The principal and Harry both agreed. Ms. Brooks asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'
Harry, after a moment: 'Legs.'
Ms Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'
The principal wondered why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: 'Pockets.'
Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into?'
Harry: 'Pants.'
Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?'
Harry: 'Coconut.'
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: 'What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?'
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, 'Bubble gum.'
Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?'
Harry: 'Shake hands'
The principal was trembling. Ms. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?'
Harry: 'Firetruck.' The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, 'Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong.....

[morbidgorilla]

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/11009/1.jpg

http://208.116.9.205/10/graphics/pics/11011/1.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.uti.com/~thekeep/lamp.jpg
Buy or Rent?

I did the math on the Paul McCartney-Heather Mills divorce. After 5 years of marriage, he paid her $49 million.
Now, assuming he banged her every night during their 5 year relationship, it ends up costing him $26,849 per lay, not counting attorney's fees and court costs. On the other hand, Elliot Spitzer's call girl Kristen charges $4,000 an hour. Crazy, right?
But...
Had Paul McCartney employed Kristen for 5 years, he would've paid $7.3 million for an hour of sex every night for 5 years (as if he really had "relations" with her everynight). That's a savings of $41+ million!
Value-added benefits are: a 22 year old hot babe, no begging, no coaxing, never a headache, wide open menu, ability to put BOTH legs around you, no *****ing and complaining or "to do" lists. Best of all, she leaves when you're done, and comes back the next day, ready for another round. All at 1/7th the cost, with no legal fees. Is it just me, or would it have been better to rent?

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/805642.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805661.html)
http://www.boners.com/content/805787.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805806.html)

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/805637.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805309.html)

http://www.boners.com/content/805606.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805281.html)

[RCKSTR]

http://www.boners.com/content/805642.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805661.html)
http://www.boners.com/content/805787.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/805806.html)
officer:"do you know why I pulled you over"
driver:"no, why?"
officer:"because it says donuts on the rear of your truck"
driver:"ok?"
officer:"well, do you have them or not?":rofl:

[FREAK]

officer:"do you know why I pulled you over"
driver:"no, why?"
officer:"because it says donuts on the rear of your truck"
driver:"ok?"
officer:"well, do you have them or not?":rofl:

:rofl:

[morbidgorilla]

Those with sensitive stomachs LOOK AWAY!!
Dont worry last one











http://www.boners.com/content/805440.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/804916.html)

[RCKSTR]

ITS ALIVE:eek: and wtf is wrong with the guy who got the 2 girls 1 cup tat?

[morbidgorilla]

immortalizing a cultural taboo
ir just lost a really big bet

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/805566.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/807759.html)

[GeoffC8]

What's wrong with 2 girls 1 cup? Now, if it was a 1 guy 1 jar tat, that'd be gross.

[morbidgorilla]

havent heard about that one
LETS CHECK!!!

[morbidgorilla]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3187/2567070558_756d0abe30.jpg?v=0
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3002/2563380475_3a4b00d887.jpg?v=0

[morbidgorilla]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3021/2658567553_72609a2976.jpg?v=0

[RCKSTR]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3021/2658567553_72609a2976.jpg?v=0
WIN:lol:

[boost25]

Agreed, WIN

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/808459.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/808563.html)

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.boners.com/content/807912.1.jpg (http://www.boners.com/grub/804986.html)

[GeoffC8]

http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w273/benweeks/Yo_dawg.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

You are on a bus, when you suddenly fart.

Luckily the music is very loud.
So every time you fart, you time it with the music.
When you start making your way to the door as you exit the bus everybody is throwing dagger looks at you.
And you suddenly realize... You're listening to your Ipod.
http://ac4.yt-thm-a02.yimg.com/image/8af0f4367661fbb8 (http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0WTefTlkGxJRD4AitCJzbkF;_ylu=X3oDMTBrMTA0N3R rBHBvcwMyMTgEc2VjA3NyBHZ0aWQD/SIG=1mlan906e/EXP=1231938149/**http%3A//images.search.yahoo.com/images/view%3Fback=http%253A%252F%252Fimages.search.yahoo .com%252Fsearch%252Fimages%253Fp%253Dfart%2526js%2 53D1%2526n%253D21%2526ni%253D18%2526ei%253DUTF-8%2526fr%253Dhp-pvnb%2526fr2%253Dtab-video%2526xargs%253D0%2526pstart%253D1%2526b%253D2 17%26w=360%26h=412%26imgurl=static.flickr.com%252F 93%252F238956148_b502df0787.jpg%26rurl=http%253A%2 52F%252Fwww.flickr.com%252Fphotos%252Ffarts%252F23 8956148%252F%26size=59.9kB%26name=Fart%2BDay%26p=f art%26type=JPG%26oid=8af0f4367661fbb8%26fusr=Farti facts.com%26tit=Fart%2BDay%26hurl=http%253A%252F%2 52Fwww.flickr.com%252Fphotos%252Ffarts%252F%26no=2 18%26tt=198,777%26sigr=11dhn1ncv%26sigi=11di4g0t0% 26sigb=13s8h9191%26sigh=113l6tkvu)

[GC4-RS]

i saw a white bugeye there a few times with subaru decals all over it, and a nice red gc impreza(i saw that drive by a few times.) As for the drug thing i couldnt agree with you more. Always thought painkillers was for pain!!!???

claremont sucks but not as much as being sighted and it not making the sightings thread lol :lol:

[jonny-rockets]

http://i301.photobucket.com/albums/nn74/S0N0S/Yo_Dawg.jpg

[GC4-RS]

^ lol

[Evoeater]

Wow that was annoying lol

[morbidgorilla]

Agreed.......lets not go there again.........its kinda creepy like the funhouse mirror room

[GC4-RS]

i always liked those funhouse mirror rooms

but waxbeans on the othe hand, those are creepy lol

[GeoffC8]

http://coppermine.styggforden.se/albums/kul/20080802/Despair_-_Boost.jpg

[GeoffC8]

http://img11.imagehosting.gr/out.php/i389515_xzibitdog2.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3209/3150649072_633896a8ed.jpg?v=0

[MsSwagglebottom]

NOT WORK SAFE
and kinda old too
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8RJerMS40c&feature=related

[MsSwagglebottom]

turbo hungry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRtymuRMZiE&feature=related
want pop tart

[SubyFr3ak]

http://img213.imageshack.us/img213/7637/nitrous4copymi7.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://pure-essence.net/stuff/funny/gasPrices.jpg (http://digg.com/travel_places/Oh_My_God_Look_At_Those_Gas_Prices_PICS)

[GeoffC8]

http://i43.tinypic.com/20fo8o.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://photos.imageevent.com/motorbiker/newspics/Furry-Scoot.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZzehRHxtB8&feature=PlayList&p=0B7394D5A97A0033&index=36

check out the slow mo

[GeoffC8]

http://photos.imageevent.com/motorbiker/newspics/Furry-Scoot.jpg
I would rock the **** out of that thing. It is simply, amazing.

[Pulski]

+1

[dayman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZzehRHxtB8&feature=PlayList&p=0B7394D5A97A0033&index=36

check out the slow mo

aliens shiz right there

[dzkwrx]

thats crazy awesome looking

[MsSwagglebottom]

note that the conjoined fetus has a hair cut rofl!!
nature...nothing has a sicker sense of humor than this mother
http://photos.armondavanes.com/Mummy%20Museum%20-%20Niavaran%20(2003)/Bizarre/slides/Bizarre003.jpg

[GC4-RS]

thats the best costume ever.....

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://fundivision.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/car1.jpg
http://fundivision.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/car2.jpg
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/43/Poser.JPG

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://jalopnik.com/assets/resources/2007/03/tailpipe_man_350.jpg
what happens when you bet on Arizona

[GeoffC8]

I shall now copy paste from 4chan.
http://img91.imageshack.us/img91/420/1233599529384nx2.jpg

[GeoffC8]

http://img294.imageshack.us/img294/7407/1233600409931yj9.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

rofl i remember those ice creams from the nineties, that was ninja turtle on a stick!!

[GeoffC8]

They were the ****!

And it's a lot harder finding stuff on 4chan that would fly here than I thought. Dear god is some of this stuff disgusting.

[GeoffC8]

http://img149.imageshack.us/img149/8459/1233600742132qw6.jpg

[GeoffC8]

Okay, thumbnailed due to size. And they're from 4chan, so assume NWS.

http://img168.imageshack.us/img168/7374/1233596807668mm2.th.jpg (http://img168.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233596807668mm2.jpg)http://img168.imageshack.us/img168/6650/1233598093022go0.th.jpg (http://img168.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598093022go0.jpg)http://img168.imageshack.us/img168/4026/1233598197837mj5.th.jpg (http://img168.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598197837mj5.jpg)
http://img523.imageshack.us/img523/6594/1233598635551om0.th.jpg (http://img523.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598635551om0.jpg)http://img523.imageshack.us/img523/386/1233598710607fc4.th.jpg (http://img523.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598710607fc4.jpg)http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/2613/1233598936978hy4.th.jpg (http://img150.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598936978hy4.jpg)
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/5960/1233600264885fx1.th.jpg (http://img515.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233600264885fx1.jpg)http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/33/1233602319420sh9.th.jpg (http://img145.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233602319420sh9.jpg)http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/7805/1233602418900ev7.th.jpg (http://img145.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233602418900ev7.jpg)

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/4/collegehumor.dd85d2625ceab1efb1083a3403126ba5.jpg

[Seraphinwolf]

Okay, thumbnailed due to size. And they're from 4chan, so assume NWS.

[/URL] (http://img168.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233596807668mm2.jpg)
(http://img168.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598197837mj5.jpg) (http://img523.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233598710607fc4.jpg)
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/5960/1233600264885fx1.th.jpg (http://img515.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233600264885fx1.jpg)[URL="http://img145.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233602418900ev7.jpg"]http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/7805/1233602418900ev7.th.jpg (http://img145.imageshack.us/my.php?image=1233602319420sh9.jpg)
Never truer words spoken on both accounts.
-Gaddis

[jonny-rockets]

And it's a lot harder finding stuff on 4chan that would fly here than I thought. Dear god is some of this stuff disgusting.

lol. 4chan is the ass hole of the internet.

[MsSwagglebottom]

nom nom nom
http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/7/7/collegehumor.a79acc07b2b277d05f07f4974a15f3e9.jpg
read your terms carefully
http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/9/collegehumor.88618f9a9c40efee2dfc4a692088e6ab.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://www.marriedtothesea.com/082907/hunk-a-junk.gif

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://www.good-thing.net/images/funny_cars10.jpg

[MsSwagglebottom]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPeHszfF3yQ

from Morbid!!

[Seraphinwolf]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPeHszfF3yQ

from Morbid!!
More proof that...
1. Asians don't understand when somethign can be taken the wrong way.
and
2.Sex is the best work out you could ever have!
-Gaddis

[cman7]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPeHszfF3yQ

from Morbid!!

WTF?:lol:

I don't even know how to respond to that one.

[morbidgorilla]

old but funny
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mji82PQTYeo&feature=related

[GeoffC8]

http://daveandthomas.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/billboard-pwn-500x434.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://cache.foxsaver.com/thumbnails/2008/05/06/878406799l.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://mitchellquigg.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/poster_worth.jpg?w=400&h=350
http://extremelyfunny.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/spanglish_fly_poster.jpg (http://extremelyfunny.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/spanglish_fly_poster.jpg)
http://extremelyfunny.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/pony_rides_poster.jpg
http://extremelyfunny.info/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/makes_junk_look_huge.jpg
http://i151.photobucket.com/albums/s131/felman87/d57abad2f3.jpg
http://img1.cdn.crunchyroll.com/i/spire3/579084475dc377549a785a70349a0fb11234431499_full.jp g

[morbidgorilla]

http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb81/Tamachan87/deadpool.jpg
http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/8009/wefearnoevilrl0.jpg
http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj218/crackmuppet/Cookies919.jpg
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_4s5pmFL_ZlQ/SGfFG17ThjI/AAAAAAAAAr0/2glZO-_tvTk/s1600/MATH%2B-%2Bwhat%2Bnow%2B*****es%2Bwww.motivationalposterso nline.blogspot.com%2Bdemotivational%2Bposters%2Bmo tivational%2Bposter%2Bfunny.jpg
http://img3.cdn.crunchyroll.com/i/spire2/85e57c477e6daf1ccf139c2699917dfb1229104929_full.jp g
http://hoboken411.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/motivate-hit-run.jpg

[Bu11dogg2]

:lol:

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JpBGRA6HHtY

[Desicus]

http://extremelyfunny.info/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/makes_junk_look_huge.jpg


ITS SOOO TRUE!!!

no really if i wear one of my uniforms to a meet you would all see my junk. very tight inseam.

[morbidgorilla]

my poppa was a navy man
he loved that
if you find anyother posters like that post'em up!!

[GeoffC8]

http://img188.imageshack.us/img188/5646/1251462427387.jpg

[LostinMaine]

^ LMAO!

[Oscar_Meyer]

http://img188.imageshack.us/img188/5646/1251462427387.jpg

:rofl: Just what I was looking for... something to totally put my mood over the endge and make my day...

Who is responsible for this?........:rofl:

[GeoffC8]

http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/fail-owned-soda-display-win.jpg

[im_so_blue]

http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/fail-owned-soda-display-win.jpg


i don't know whether to say thats freakin awesome.... or if someone had wayyyy too much time on their hands

i guess both suits it equally :lol:

[morbidgorilla]

Mike Rowe really needs your help finding dirty jobs!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2l0rhvTFCQ

[Oscar_Meyer]

:rofl:

[morbidgorilla]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/f8b47926-625d-49c7-8b74-1ebd56275deb.jpg (http://chzb.gr/dbKl8a)


I will NEVER let this thread die!!

[morbidgorilla]

http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/9300000/The-Joker-Batman-the-joker-9372965-640-970.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://holycrapthatsfunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Batman-Xzibit.jpg

[morbidgorilla]

http://static.funnyjunk.com/pictures/untitled12219.jpg (http://www.newenglandsubarus.com/funny_pictures/44640/What+if+Bella+Edward+Jasper/)

[morbidgorilla]

http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/wacky-edibles/c399/
http://www.newenglandsubarus.com/images/products/frontsquare/c399_tactical_canned_bacon.jpghttp://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/zoom/c399_tactical_canned_bacon.jpg

[Seraphinwolf]

Mmmm... Bacon!
"I don't know what the "T" or the "S" stand for but the "B" stands for Bacon, and I LOVE Bacon!"

Gotta love TBS's line up!